Why do insults offend me? To maintain social order is why.
I think its because society itself, makes it necessary, and that is all. There is no other reason whatsoever at the root of me being offended by words alone.
Let's say you call me fat, ugly or stupid. If I were in full control of my faculties, I would look at the accusation objectively in case I'd missed something I didn't already know.
In the one case where they were correct about their allegation, I would thank them for reinforcing the truth and ask why they had chosen me as recipient of their exertions in saying so. In the other where they were incorrect, surely I would laugh it off and treat them like a fool to be mocked.
And in either case, walk away, nearly always none the wiser and wondering why they had bothered at all.
So why is it I am offended when someone insults me? Is it because I know the power of social forces which are totally outside my control, cannot be accounted for and are nearly always unfair or too fair?
Is it because I know that if the wider social group hears about the allegation and cottons onto it, they are likely to agree without looking themselves, trusting it implicitly. It is trusted so easily because its likely the social group are correct on the whole, but more so, that society is designed to maintain order at any cost to the individual who is a lesser entity - 'the needs of the many, outweigh the needs of the few or the one'.
It's the effects of this wider group that scares me. This unregulated, unlawful, unaccountable force now has the power to call in an army of supporters against my person, inasmuch as the allegation suggests, with impunity.
The same should be true for flattery. If I'm commended in any way the same force would intensify my credit among the community.
But does it work equally both ways? I don't think so. Without too much analysis I can see the bad news about a persons personal character, abilities or physical appearance spreads like a firestorm. But the opposite is hardly ever true.
I'm guessing this is because social life is biased toward the collective, which incentivises individuals to conform to its strictly ordered rules. Where group punishment is the primary enforcer.
And when a commendation does succeed for an individual, that is only when that individual is a model of collective order in the eyes of the social group, thus reinforcing the order that much more intensely.
For the benefit of the defenders of social organisation, I'm neither for nor against it. I am just pointing at it for further scrutiny by the bold among us. Because when you think about it historically, society is no more than a human invention. And who knows for what purpose humanity created it. Or even if it emerged from the cosmic background independently to assure our orderliness within creation, and humanity accepted it without further ado
Most humans would say society is better than the alternative. But is it? Who is to say that the world would be a worse place without it, with overwhelming evidence?
There's nothing inherent in social organisation that makes it a better doctrine for the world. It is just the current one the great masse of people support without question. Particularly the libertarian doctrine which claims individual rights and free speech more than the other leading belief systems. But when push comes to shove, this leading light of political freedoms is soon asking for protection from the collective - clearly that doctrine is yet another high sounding masquerade.
And for the socialist out there, do not mock the libertarian so quickly. When hard times come for the socialist, your God is immediately commanding you to call for more freedom. Yet another fantasy worldview helping the individual escape back into a fully ordered social organisation without even knowing it.
But the leading light in this cosmic theatre or religiosity, is atheism. What form of despotic father figure within social organisation sits higher than a religion like this?
There is nothing obvious making society the better thing. And it is the thing which can corral large groups of people to attack individuals it does not agree with, without needing to educate that group or reward them for their efforts in maintaining order.
We call the activity of unconsciously policing rogue individuals - "My Duty".